I need a makeover!!

Here's the deal. I am having a mid-20s crisis! That's right- I am turning 25 in just under TWO MONTHS. Whoa. How does life go so quickly?! And why do I feel like I am having such a crisis? I will look at my life to decide. I graduated last July and have now been at my first real job for over a year. I love what I do. My job is fun (and a blessing!), life is good, yet I have struggled this past year to find real satisfaction.

Why is this? Maybe it's the challenges I have faced? Maybe it's the fact that I have now moved 4 times in the past year, leaving me feeling unsettled? Maybe it's the fact that I am writing this at 1:30 in the morning? All good possibilities, but not the real root issue. The root is... are you ready?... that I have lost self-discipline. I seemed to have it all together for so long, but it's been fading for the last year and almost completely gone now. With that loss of discipline, I also sadly note that my self-esteem has taken a bit hit. Can you believe it? Someone who had it so together a year ago now feeling like they're barely scraping by.

Ha! I just found this picture. I think it's my year ago self seeing myself now and wondering what in the world I am doing now!!

So, how to fix it?! In a recent inventory meeting with my boss, she challenged me to think about long term career goals and I realized I didn't have any. Once I realized that, I soon began to realize that not only do I lack them professionally, but I also lack them in every aspect of my life. It seems that if I do I set goals lately, I inevitably dismiss the goal within a few weeks or even a few days and not much comes of it!

I realized tonight that I had hit rock bottom in the middle of the 6-hour version of Pride & Prejudice and I glanced down to see a half-eaten bowl of cookie dough. Ugh. And gross!

That's not what I want! That's not who I am. Luckily, I haven't started packing on lbs because I am pretty active, but I have to think that all of this will catch up with me soon!!

After much consideration, I have decided to take my life into my own hands and start to make the changes I want to see that will help me find greater confidence, trust in the Lord and hopefully a husband. ;) I'd like to call this plan HP (no, not Hewlett Packard or Harry Potter... it stands for husband prep!) I am making the plans for HP as we speak (it includes going to bed earlier!) and will post it on here soon. I can't wait to make all the plans. Any help and motivation is welcomed (and needed!)

-Kate